Hi,
Thanks for joining me this week.
As a reminder:
I’ll send you a useful tip each week to help you improve your communication skills.
TIP OF THE WEEK
[Your Words Matter]
The way you speak shapes how you experience life and influences the outcomes of your conversations.
Think of yourself as a meaning-maker; you create meaning through the words you choose.
Do you often use words like:
- Good/Bad
- Right/Wrong
- Always/Never
- Should/Shouldn't
If so, it's time to grow your emotional vocabulary.
By choosing different words, you can change how you see and talk about your experiences.
When you're stuck feeling bad about something or blaming others, ask yourself these three questions:
1) What actually happened?
- Just the plain facts, like a news headline. Example: "Person took four hours to reply to a text message."
2) What meaning did you give it?
- Examine your beliefs about what should happen. Example: "If they cared, they would reply faster. They must be ignoring me."
3) How did you react to that meaning?
- Look at how your interpretation affected your behaviour. Example: "I got angry and sent angry messages without checking if they were okay. Later I learned their phone ran out of battery and they had no signal."
The Key Point
Events only have the meaning you choose to give them.
Your feelings come from your interpretation, not the event itself.
This simplifies your choices:
- You can change the meaning you give to situations
- You control your emotional responses
- You're responsible for your interpretations
2 QUOTES THAT STOOD OUT TO ME THIS WEEK
"Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize and understand emotions in yourself and others, and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships.”
- Travis Bradberry
"In a study of skills that distinguish star performers in every field from entry-level jobs to executive positions, the single most important factor was not IQ, advanced degrees, or technical experience; it was EQ."
- Peter Salovey
1 QUESTION FOR YOU
Are my words creating the reality I want to live in?
Until next week,
Scott
p.s. My Sunday Times bestseller 'Order Out of Chaos' is coming out in paperback on Nov 8th.
It's your step-by-step guide to mastering emotions and winning every negotiation.
Don't miss out - preorder now and join thousands in transforming your life and career today.
Click here to secure your copy.
Let's Transform How you Handle Critical Conversations.
